Hello All,

A few weeks ago I was having coffee with Mary and I said I was a little worried about losing my perspective that I have gained while being here in NZ to the busyness of home. She suggessted I write a letter to myself.

So I guess here it goes.

Dear Mathias (Future Self),

I hope you are reading this in some sort of foul mood so that it cheers you up to here from an older version of you. Anywho I hope that adjustment to the states has been well but I wanted to remind you of a few things you learned in New Zealand.

People are more important than things: Remember how important people are and make sure they take a good priority in yourlife. Value their inclusion in your life and try and be accepting. Don’t be a Jerk. Remember what it feels like to be insecure and vulnerable in a new environment. Reach out and help others. Remember what is most central is often the most well experienced.

Find Joy in Little Things: Take opportunities as they come and see the upside in problems. A lot of things that perhaps didn’t work out as you plan can still be great joy and happiness. Make sure to try and focus on the upside.

Include others in your life: This may seem very close to the prieviosly written paragraph but it is different. Try and include others in your life and your activities regardless of what how they respond. This fits in with taking risks with other people. I am not saying to rely on their participation but make sure invites go out to those who need it. No one likes to be left out.

Find Courage and Take Risks: Remember the mantra that courage is not the absence of fear but the ability to see that something is greater than that fear. Even if something goes wrong you still won’t be sorry you tried. Well hopefully. Although I know me and you will still calculate those risks. But try and be a little more risk tolerant.

Listen Better: Remember to seek first to understand and then to be understood. Stop trying to put your own spin on what other people are telling you and learn from their perspective. People don’t need someone to tell them what to do when they ask you to listen. They need to feel understood and that is only achieved through good active listening. Hell maybe even take a class on it.

Don’t overstate commitments: If you make a commitment intend to keep it. If you overstrech yourself with duplicate commitments you don’t generate trust in those around you. Thus be careful with those things that are maybe’s. This isn’t too much of a problem currently but can be. You can’t be everything to everybody. Attempt some sort of teamwork or delegation.

Be Thankful: Although this one is already somewhat established in your (our I guess) persona it is important that you remember to be thankful to all of those in life. As well be appreciative of gifts. Remeber the importance of Thank you.

Be Vulnerable: This topic is always a toughy because not many people want a basket case. People still need to have some way to connect and thus it is important to be vulnerable in some aspects to allow others to become apart of your life. This is probably the oddest but seems to be very rewarding.

Be Truthful: Remember to be guniuine and not duplicitous in your actions. Although it might hurt in the short term it is a better long term strategy. With truthfulness also comes being forthright and both are important and similar. Keep trying to do your best in this arena.

This is perhaps the hardest one of all. Remeber to focus on the important rather than the urgent. Yes there are some things that are required to be done immediately but higher leverage tasks need to have more focus. Evaluate before taking action on what really matters.

Have fun in life. Worry less about what others think and enjoy yourself.

Anywho self I hope that you have retained at least some of these lessons and applied them to our “real life.” Also remember how good of a show scrubs is. Seriously the writing for that show is amazing. Best of Luck future self!

-Mathias 6/24/10